I have one hard question for you: do you want to save your marriage? If the answer is in the affirmative, you have a difficult road ahead of you. But, before you venture down that path, you definitely have to answer "Yes" to the above question.
Take a realistic look at the state of your marriage. Is this the man you really want to be with in five years?
If not, you shouldn't need to read any further. Just go out and find a good divorce attorney.
Are you still with me? Great. I’m going to show you how you can save your marriage.
Once you are certain that your marriage is worth saving, you can begin to do the work that is necessary. You shouldn't even think about consulting the divorce lawyer any more. You’ve made the resolution to stay with your relationship.
Once you have put divorce out of your mind, accept that there will need to be real adjustments in the relationship. If you want the marriage to work more than your husband does, then you are the person who will have to make most of the changes. That’s just a fact. It is like the person who has the greater aversion to messiness is usually the one doing the most cleaning around the house. The person who desires the relationship to improve more will have to do the majority of the changing.
You have to be prepared to communicate more as well. Put some time aside to get to know your husband once again. If he has hobbies that he is willing to share with you, get engaged in it even if you are not all that into darts or football.
If your husband is willing to agree to it, marriage counseling may be the thing necessary to save your marriage. A relationship counselor or therapist will be able to examine your marriage from the outside, ask in-depth questions, and get you to open up to each other.
There has never been any such thing as a perfect relationship. Once you have the "ideal" out of your mind, you will be able to focus on what is real and what is desired. These are the fundamentals you should be bringing into play in your marriage.
Do you want to save your marriage? Great. But know the serious work that lies ahead of you.